How to talk to a referee

[lmeadski]

this weekend. It was a 10-team tournament. Before my son's game (8th grade), against a rival, the refs decided to "let them play." This was covered in the captains meeting at mid-court during pregame. There were no incidences of overly rough play all day. In this game, however, we had two player ejections for what became increasingly aggressive play. It was a great contrast to other games that were called, for lack of a better word, normally. As a coach, and a ref, I do believe kids will play to the level of contact allowed by the refs (the same way some teams play up or down to the level of their opponents). As one example, many times during our JV/V games, we refs talk at the breaaks about "tightening things up" because "the play underneath is getting too aggressive." Of course, we want the kids to be able to play. And, of course, we make foul calls based on advantage/disadvantage. However, aggressive play begats aggressive play. Yes, coaches have a role in how their kids play. But what coach in his right mind is going to say,"I know they aren't calling fouls, but I want us to continue our conservative play and let them continue to bang us." Sorry, ain't gonna happen.