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Dan_ref Sun Oct 23, 2005 03:28pm

OK Mr Crow, I see you aint gonna play my game of 20 questions, or maybe you are & you dropped me another big clue with your answer. Not that it matters, just keep posting.

And never mind rainmaker, she was doing community service at the home for the morbidly stuffy a while ago & while teaching the residents how to do the hustle she dropped her sense of humor & broke it.

rainmaker Sun Oct 23, 2005 06:02pm

Quote:

Originally posted by Dan_ref
OK Mr Crow, I see you aint gonna play my game of 20 questions, or maybe you are & you dropped me another big clue with your answer. Not that it matters, just keep posting.

And never mind rainmaker, she was doing community service at the home for the morbidly stuffy a while ago & while teaching the residents how to do the hustle she dropped her sense of humor & broke it.

Dan, you know full well, I LIVE at the Home For the Morbidly Stuffy (the Company Parlor, as we prefer to call it!), and I've never in my life done The Hustle!! Hmmpphhh!!

JCrow Sun Oct 23, 2005 08:00pm

Rainmaker - Making sense is in the eye of the beholder. Usually Mrs. JCrow. I thought Golf made sense so I gave it a try.

One day, I found myself playing with John Daly, Jack Nicklaus, and Michele Wie. You know Jack's image as an avuncular good-will statesman for golf? All wrong. On the first Tee, Daly pulls me aside and says,

"Watch out for frigin' Nicklaus...he cheats. He'll do anything to win. The most dangerous Wood in his bag is his pencil!"

All thru the round Nicklaus would drive it into the woods. You'd hear...."whack...whack....whack....". Then he'd putt out and say,

"I got a Par."

On the Fifth Fairway, he deliberately ran his golf cart over Michele Wie's foot. The poor kid had to limp into the Clubhouse with her father swearing at Nicklaus in Korean.

I'm no match for Jack Nicklaus, even if he does have metal wood for a hip. I currently have a 43 handicap. But I had a Plan. I said,

"Look Jack. I say me and you go mano un mano. With one small stipulation....we can Trash-talk just like in basketball."

He says sure and hands Daly a thick roll of cash which I matched.

On the Sixth Tee as Nicklaus wound up his backswing, I blurt out,

"Hey, look! Arnold Plamer and Laura Davies are in the woods making whoopie!"

He shanked it onto the Interstate Highway.

I kept it up all round and beat him by an Old School NBA Score of 137-129.














WhistlesAndStripes Sun Oct 23, 2005 08:21pm

Re: Re: o man
 
Quote:

Originally posted by rainmaker
Quote:

Originally posted by deecee
seriously you should be given your own column on this forum cuz you are one funny SOB.

your stories make no sense but they are great keep it up.

maybe over to the General Discussion Board?

While we're at it, let's banish the baseball discussion there too.

JCrow Mon Oct 24, 2005 03:47pm

OK....OK....I'll go back to being serious. It's very hard for me. Last week, my wife and I rented "Aviator"...it was the Howard Hughes Story.

After the movie, my wife said,

"Jeezz....was he nut's or what?"

I said,

"He seemed OK to me....he just didn't like germs much."

I've always had a weird since of humor. I started my career as a Construction Engineer. You know...the guy with a transit. In 1981, I was on a Road Job and after levelling the instrument...I stepped in front of an oncoming 18 wheeler. It was the Best Player Control Foul, ever.

I was going in and out of it until they got me to the ER. One of the Doctors bent over my gurney and asked.

"How you feelin' buddy?"

I looked up and said,

"Run down?"

(That's my first true story - other than we did have a pig farm on old Rt. 66 in Carthage in 1952. I read years later about Wilt making those x-country rides.)


zebraman Mon Oct 24, 2005 04:39pm

This stuff is great JCrow. LOL.

Z


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