I had the pleasure this past weekend of working with a guy I worked with my first couple of months on the job and it reminded me of a story I have when I worked with him the first time .
I had been reffing about a month and I was starting to get confident about my abilty to "see" the court when I showed up one Saturday morning to work some mid-level AAU games . My partner that day was a seasoned D-1 ref (also a very physically intimidating dude )who I had seen working on numerous occasions (He only worked with one other guy...who happened to be a D-1 guy as well) but I had never spoken with because he didn't "chat" with the other guys . I approached him to speak about how he would like to handle these games (Switching only on shooting fouls or every foul etc) and let him know that I was fairly new and if he saw anything he thought I should work on to let me know . He grunted his answers and we ran through the first half pretty easily although towards the end of the half he seemed to get a little lazy on signalling a 3 point attempt when he was the lead and the ball was down in his corner so I helped him out and signalled the 3 point attempt was good when they went in . This also happened a few times in the second half an I again helped him out and the game ended with no issues . I was feeling pretty happy with myself for holding my own with a respected veteran and when we went into the locker room to rest between games I asked him if there was anything I needed to work on . He looked me right in the eye for about 4 seconds without saying anything and then said "If you keep looking in my area and signal one more three pointer I will break your F*&*&$ arms" then he turned and walked away. Needless to say I was shocked and the next two games I don't even think I looked anywhere near his primary (a little bit of an exageration)..
We sat down after the game and he actually told me that he had been watching me ref and had requested to work with me because he had noticed two things 1)I had a desire to get better because he heard me asking questions to some of the veteran officials there and then actually listening to their answers. 2) He noticed I was ball watching and wanted to break me of the habit and get me to trust my partners .
Lesson learned !!!! A good friend was made and I ball watch no more !



[Edited by WeekendRef on Apr 19th, 2005 at 12:06 AM]

Good story!

Great title!

Aren't you suppose to mirror his signal when the 3 pointer is good? :confused:

The D-1 partner WAS lead, so it would have been proper for WkndRef to mirror, if the lead signalled. I couldn't tell from his description whether he didn't signal at all, or whether it was just not a good signal. And the partner didn't say that the shots weren't 3's, just that he didn't want WkndRef to signal. WHich I agree with you, I don't understand.

Looks to me like the D-1 dude was setting him up. I am guessing he purposely didn't signal, thereby baiting weekendref into signalling, and then getting the opportunity to mention his little arm breaking thing....

clarification
 

Sorry....I was trying to cut corners last night because the post was a lot longer then intended .
1)My partner was not signalling at all even though the shots were clearly 3 point attempts .
2) he was definitely setting me up me to see if my eyes were where they should not have been
3) He actually turned out to be a great guy once I got to know him and He has really taken me under his wing . His method of correcting my ball watching while unorthodox is one I will never forget and may even use when I become a mentor to some young wide eyed official .

Re: clarification
 

He may be an OK guy, but his method of correcting your ball watching was stupid and out-of-line. We're adults and there are ways to correct another official's weaknesses without dropping F-bombs or threatening. You took it well, but most newer officials would find his method discouraging rather than constructive. Hopefully when you are in the mentoring position, you'll be more mature than him.

Z

Z ,
I agree his method was a little crude but apparantly he read his audience well and it was highly successful in getting me to remain in my primary . When / if I do use this when mentoring I will probably use a more lightheated approach as that is my personality . My partner has a different way of communicating but it was effective in this instance.....I do plan on asking him if he has done this before .
This weekend I did a set of games with him and during the last one the coach of one of the teams starts complaining before the game even starts and just continues the whole game (Not loud but barely enough for us to hear). I T him up midway thru the first half and then at half my partner tells me that the guy is really gonna have to say something out of line to get the second T because there was no way he was gonna let that coach get out of the broiling hot gym and enjoy the best day of the year if he couldn't get outside.
Late in the game during a timeout the coach asks us if we are "patched" because I was wearing a plain ref shirt as was my partner . My partner just looked down at him and said "No,but we did stay at a Holiday Inn last night" coming from him (As I have said he is a large intimidating man )it might have been one of the funniest things I have ever heard . Coach spent the rest of the game sitting on the bench sweating and did not say another word the whole game .

This is the kind of thing that facinates me about moving up to "the next level". I think the key to this whole discussion was how the seasoned D-1 guy read his partner and was able to get the ball-watching point across in an effective manner. I would be willing to bet he doesn't use that method on everyone. Using the Holiday Inn line works on some people, but not others. The key is knowing when to use it. At some level, I think we all have essentially the same judgement, skills, and rules knowledge, but what helps the better ones move up is their ability to handle people.

I'd like to bet that if he did that to most people, he would have never been able to see if it worked because while he worked the 2nd game he would have been looking at tail lights as we left the parking lot.

I'm glad it worked and you'll always remember that. I consider myself fairly humble and want my game to be critiqued in every way, but I'm still an adult and don't know if I could have continued working with him that day.

it wasn't that bad
 

c'mon what the D-1 guy said wasn't that bad...as for being humble and wanting critiqued that is a great asset...but to get in your car and leave because he dropped an fbomb or the way he handled it, to me shows quite the opposite of humble. The chances to work with officials of that level are few and far between, I can't think that any of us here wouldn't want the opportunity, even at lower levels. I am not sure what it would take from a D-1 guy for me not to want to finish the day with him and learn...maybe something along the lines of

"hey you suck, and if you step on this floor with me again I am leaving" :D

... but short of that I finish out the day and welcome any advice or comment....

Good Lord. I probably would have laughed if he said that to me. Then I might have made a joke out of it. Of course we are going to have people here that would be offended. These individuals get offended over the spilling a glass of milk. If they would have left, then let them leave. It is not everyone's job to not offend someone at some point. The official wanted to get the point across and he got his point across. That is all that matters at this point. Not everyone is going make you feel good when they are critiquing you. That is not how the world works.

Peace

"Fine. But the next time a coach jumps my a$$ because your can't get your f$*%ing arm in the air, I'm gonna rip your head off and $hit down your neck!"

:)

Re: it wasn't that bad
 

You might want to sit down and think for a minute about what you said; there's alot of ways to communicate and sure, not everyone is good at it or even very tactful but I'm not interested in someone threatening assault as an attempt to teach me something.

On the other hand, if that doesn't bother you then you're alot thicker skinned than I am.

If this guy really is a D1 official, he sure didn't get there by talking to people like that and if you're willing to take that then go for it, but for me I'm not going to kis this guys arsk just so he can give me some advice. There's way to many "good guys" from those ranks who are willing to be helpful in a friendly way.

Quote:

Originally posted by WeekendRef "If you keep looking in my area and signal one more three pointer I will break your F*&*&$ arms!"

People get fired for using this language in the workplace. People get the heck beat out of them when they speak to people this way. The guy may be a good ref at the D-1 level, but if he can't get his point across in a better way, he ain't the sharpest tool in the shed.

Z