10 Commandments of Basketball Officiating

[Mark Padgett]

Now that it's the holiday season, I thought you might enjoy this. I made up these 10 Commandments of Basketball Officiating for my association's newsletter.

10 Commandments of Basketball Officiating

In the beginning, there was only football and baseball. Then, the Naismith looked down upon the gymnasium floor and said, “Let there be peach baskets.” And there were peach baskets. And they were good.

1. thou shalt not embarrass thy partner

2. thou shalt not covet thy partner’s calling area

3. thou shalt carry an extra whistle

4. thou shalt not allow the abomination known as “overtime”

5. thou shalt not engage in conversation with the kingdom of people known as “spectators”, for they are unknowledgeable and unclean

6. thou shalt not engage in arguments with the kingdom of people known as “coaches”, for they are unknowledgeable and unholy, especially the dark one known by many names including the “Red Knight from Indiana”

7. thou shalt not utter the words “over the back” and “reach”, for they are an affront to Naismith

8. thou shalt not allow the children of Naismith to adorn themselves with gold and precious metals about their bodies during play

9. thou shalt not allow the children of Naismith to hang on the holy peach baskets unless they are protecting themselves from evil

10. thou shalt not eat bean burritos just prior to the holy ritual known as the “tip off”