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-   -   Respect for Officials (https://forum.officiating.com/basketball/100402-respect-officials.html)

WhistlesAndStripes Wed Nov 25, 2015 05:16pm

Respect for Officials
 
Here is an interesting read, no matter what sport you officiate.

Referees Struggle With Respect Amid Growing Hostility - ABC News

SC Official Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:47pm

Remember guys, it's all about the kids. :rolleyes:

Refhoop Wed Nov 25, 2015 11:32pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by SC Official (Post 970836)
Remember guys, it's all about the kids. :rolleyes:


Its "all about the kids"? This mantra of "all about the kids" is producing a generation of ingrates with an ever decreasing respect for rules, authority and folks in uniform.
Since when is it ever "all about" any of us or any one group?
While I don't agree that kids are meant to be seen and not heard; I am definitely not on board with "all about the kids".
I thought we were in this to help young people learn good citizenship and because we love the game...?
It isn't about me, but it certainly isn't "all about kids"!

JRutledge Thu Nov 26, 2015 06:34am

It is about the game, not the kids or even us. But the officials are the "Arbiters of the game." If we do not do our job, the game will suffer. Kids come and go and largely the officials stay in place much longer than even many coaches.

Peace

SC Official Thu Nov 26, 2015 08:32am

Refhoop, the rolling eyes emoticon makes obvious the sarcasm in my post. Thanks for the lecture though.

Refhoop Thu Nov 26, 2015 12:51pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by SC Official (Post 970866)
Refhoop, the rolling eyes emoticon makes obvious the sarcasm in my post. Thanks for the lecture though.

My bad SC - didn't see that. :o

so cal lurker Fri Nov 27, 2015 12:10pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Refhoop (Post 970845)
Its "all about the kids"? This mantra of "all about the kids" is producing a generation of ingrates with an ever decreasing respect for rules, authority and folks in uniform.
Since when is it ever "all about" any of us or any one group?
While I don't agree that kids are meant to be seen and not heard; I am definitely not on board with "all about the kids".
I thought we were in this to help young people learn good citizenship and because we love the game...?
It isn't about me, but it certainly isn't "all about kids"!

I think it depends upon who is saying it and what it means. "All about the kids," to me doesn't mean mean the kids get to be disrespectful about rules, authority, or folks in uniform. I've always thought it meant -- when used properly:
- giving the kids an opportunity to play
- letting the kids learn what it means to work together and be part of a team
- that it's not about the parents who should stay out of it
- teaching the kids the game including how to play properly with respect and sportsmanship
- teaching the kids to be responsible for themselves and their own behavior, to suffer the consequences that come with their failings
- teaching kids to learn how to be gracious in both winning and losing.

"It's all about the kids" is a great mantra -- if used properly and not used by $%@#$ as an excuse to berate officials -- when they do that, they aren't making it about the kids, but about themselves and their own hurt feelings. Parents and coaches who actually believe it all about the kids aren't yelling at the refs, they are teaching their players/kids that refs are people too, that refs are going to make mistakes, and that living with those mistakes and rising beyond them is simply part of the game -- and life.

(Aside: My son is a frosh basketball player, and I was recently at the parent meeting for all winter parents. The AD made a point of talking about appropriate parent behavior, which does not include yelling at refs. He went on to say that part of the problem is that refs leave because they get tired of being yelled at/abused. He also pointed out to the parents that because there aren't enough refs, it's probably true that the lower divisions don't get the best refs -- and then gave the example of what a JV soccer ref gets paid, to do a game on his own (because there aren't enough refs to assign more than one), and what that translated to once you considered the travel time, getting there early, etc. And when we moved to the individual team meeting, my son's coach reiterated that he didn't want to hear parents or players yelling at refs.)

Refhoop Fri Nov 27, 2015 12:44pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by so cal lurker (Post 970951)
I think it depends upon who is saying it and what it means. "All about the kids," to me doesn't mean mean the kids get to be disrespectful about rules, authority, or folks in uniform. I've always thought it meant -- when used properly:
- giving the kids an opportunity to play
- letting the kids learn what it means to work together and be part of a team
- that it's not about the parents who should stay out of it
- teaching the kids the game including how to play properly with respect and sportsmanship
- teaching the kids to be responsible for themselves and their own behavior, to suffer the consequences that come with their failings
- teaching kids to learn how to be gracious in both winning and losing.

"It's all about the kids" is a great mantra -- if used properly and not used by $%@#$ as an excuse to berate officials -- when they do that, they aren't making it about the kids, but about themselves and their own hurt feelings. Parents and coaches who actually believe it all about the kids aren't yelling at the refs, they are teaching their players/kids that refs are people too, that refs are going to make mistakes, and that living with those mistakes and rising beyond them is simply part of the game -- and life.

(Aside: My son is a frosh basketball player, and I was recently at the parent meeting for all winter parents. The AD made a point of talking about appropriate parent behavior, which does not include yelling at refs. He went on to say that part of the problem is that refs leave because they get tired of being yelled at/abused. He also pointed out to the parents that because there aren't enough refs, it's probably true that the lower divisions don't get the best refs -- and then gave the example of what a JV soccer ref gets paid, to do a game on his own (because there aren't enough refs to assign more than one), and what that translated to once you considered the travel time, getting there early, etc. And when we moved to the individual team meeting, my son's coach reiterated that he didn't want to hear parents or players yelling at refs.)


Love this! Problem is that sentences that start with "all" are nearly doomed before finished.
It is about kids, but never "all"; But SC straightened me out on that yesterday.
I do understand and agree with 99% of what you wrote though.

bballref3966 Fri Nov 27, 2015 12:48pm

My philosophy is clear. I referee because I love to referee and I love basketball. I never have and never will referee "for the kids." As harsh as it may sound, I really couldn't care less about the kids with respect to why I referee. They don't "deserve" my services, and if I get tired of refereeing one day, I'll quit. "The kids" aren't going to make or break my job.

BillyMac Fri Nov 27, 2015 12:56pm

A Care Package ...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by bballref3966 (Post 970956)
My philosophy is clear. I referee because I love to referee and I love basketball.

I care about doing a great job officiating for myself (pride), my partners (we're a team), the referee board that I represent, the players (the kids), the coaches, the school administrators (site directors, athletic directors, principals), the parents, the other fans, and for the Game of Basketball, a game that I love, as a player, a fan, a twenty-five year middle school coach, and, for thirty-five years, an official)

When I screw up, I feel that I've let down all of the above, and I do my best not to make the same mistake again.

Refhoop Fri Nov 27, 2015 01:09pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by BillyMac (Post 970957)
I care about doing a great job officiating for myself (pride), my partners (we're a team), the referee board that I represent, the players (the kids), the coaches, the school administrators (site directors, athletic directors, principals), the parents, the other fans, and for the Game of Basketball, a game that I love, as a player, a fan, a twenty-five year middle school coach, and, for thirty-five years, an official)

When I screw up, I feel that I've let down all of the above, and I do my best not to make the same mistake again.


You're a true educator - as am I; and I definitely need more motivation than myself or the kids!

WhistlesAndStripes Sat Nov 28, 2015 02:49pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Refhoop (Post 970960)
You're a true educator - as am I; and I definitely need more motivation than myself or the kids!


Me too. That's why it's all about the Benjamins!![emoji3]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Adam Sat Nov 28, 2015 03:21pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by bballref3966 (Post 970956)
My philosophy is clear. I referee because I love to referee and I love basketball. I never have and never will referee "for the kids." As harsh as it may sound, I really couldn't care less about the kids with respect to why I referee. They don't "deserve" my services, and if I get tired of refereeing one day, I'll quit. "The kids" aren't going to make or break my job.

+1

I do a lot of things for my kids. I do some things for the kids in my church. I don't ref "for the kids," though. I ref because I enjoy it.

My issue with the phrase is not the word "all." My issue is when officials use it to chastise other officials for having the wrong motive.


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