How long do you get suspended for if you wear the wrong brand of pants?

Oh, ok. I was reading it as though you were the BU, thats why I was confused.

I agree.

Generally speaking, I give the count when the batter gets to 2 strikes or 3 balls, first time it is a full count and after a lengthy delay between pitches (stolen base, long fly ball that was foul, mound conference, etc).

And is it true the plate coat was outlawed this year?

Not that I am aware of.

Any reason why the last part of my post was deleted? Just looking for answers. Thanks.

How about using a hockey style mask without a cap underneath?

I wonder how anyone can take anything from those clowns seriously.

I agree with the ridicule of some of our state's regulations, but that is not necessarily a reflection on the umpires themselves.

I give the count when I deem it necessary. Is this really difficult?

Ultimate solution
 

In order to be consistent about this, why don't we ask game management to hire some very attractive young lady, and she can give the count in any manner she likes at any time? Players would certainly look over at her and see the count , so as not to lose track of where the "counter" is. :D