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First of all, I think its great that you are having a moment of self reflection and acknowledging what you can do better and this is a great use of the forum.
I know for me in the heat of a game flow, its sometime really hard to understand what a coach is asking about and 9x out of 10, I probably don't really get the full extent of what they are trying to ask because they are trying to spew it out as quickly as I am trying to listen to it. In your case, where the coach called a timeout to specifically discuss it, I think it really warrants taking a deep breath, slowing everything down, and making sure you hear the ins and outs of his concerns. Then like others have said, use the rule book to explain. But taking that pause and slowing things down, to me helps.
In fact, I have found that officiating has really helped to slow me down in my professional 8 to 5 job. Its allowed me to really see things from different viewpoints.
Hope this helps.
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"They don't play the game because we show up to officiate it"
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