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Congratulations!
I didn't start reffing until my kids were older, although I was playing a lot of sports at the time mine were born.
I think it is definitely something you should discuss with your wife. It also depends on who else will be in the house when you are reffing and how long you will be gone. If it is just your wife and baby, then you will probably be missed. If someone else (such as her mother) is also staying with you, then you probably won't be missed as much.
I used to play in a men's rec basketball league and a teammate played the night of child #5's birth and his wife didn't seem to mind. I was considering playing rec softball the day after my oldest child was born, but decided not to when my best friend (other than her) said he would stop by the hospital for a visit. I'm still hearing about it and I didn't even play.
If you do ref, I think you should take the approach that it is a fun break from your 9-to-5 and parenting duties rather than a 2nd job which you will then need a break from.
On a related note, my other advice is to start saving plastic bags now to put the diapers in.
Congratulations!
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