Sometimes you just have to laugh with them. Definitely don't try to defend your calls to any fan... or even any coach (playing the part of an obnoxious fan). Maintain your integrity all the time but also be personable.
Working a game yesterday. Returning to the plate from 3rd base. Some fan/guy with his fingers in the back stop says "About time I see a little hustle out of you Blue!" First game of the day for me and first inning. I very easily could have taken offense at such a stupid comment... and made my own stupid comment in retaliation... and the fight would have begun in earnest.
I laughed and responded "YES! (Agreeing with a heckler has an incredible pacifying affect.) Occasionally I have to hustle but usually in this kind of heat, I'm limited to about three steps of hustle before I need a rest." I laughed and walked to the plate. He laughed and the next half inning he's setting on the bench. He's one of the coaches!
A subtle change in my attitude and a personable response allowed us to have a great game. If I had retaliated or tried to defend myself by saying that this was my first game of the day and the first time I really needed to hustle... not only would it still be 104 degrees and blaring sun but I would have had an opponent/nemesis for every call I made for the entire game.
Keep your integrity (your calls are yours and they are not to be negotiated or questioned by any fan or coach... so don't even begin any kind of a discussion that could lead to confrontation. Only defend your calls when you are specifically asked in a professional manner and there could possibly be some confusion - and then don't allow/do that very often (a couple times per game is plenty, if not too much). Always keep a personable, approachable attitude. Talk with the players and compliment them for a job well done. Be respectful of the coaches and the job they do.
If you are an umpire in amature leagues for the money you are fighting a loosing battle. Have fun and do a great job so that your time is enjoyable and you have pride in the work you have accomplished when the game is done.
I've many situations to the contrary... it is not always easy to be positive and personable.
