[KentuckyBlue]

These jerks' remarks are undermining your confidence. They are at least partially succeeding because (a) they're hammering away so relentlessly hoping to find a weak point, and (b) said weak point is that you are inwardly worried that you aren't really Mr. Consistent as you wish you could present yourself.

To minimize the influence of these remarks and your tendency to toss players too quickly for them, you need a rock-solid image of yourself as a consistent ball-strike caller. This requires enough practice and schooling so that you KNOW inwardly you're always right. When you know that, your self-image will be so secure that the jerks can't get you. Then you can concentrate on only bouncing people who too publicly challenge your authority (say, perhaps, the catcher in "c" that said "Oh my God") but not the others who were more civilly stating their opinions. I don't believe that we Americans forfeit the right to our opinions just because we're on a softball field, so I typically let whoever it is say whatever they feel ONCE, then we go on -- unless it's personally insulting, combative, or too much a public challenge to the umpire's authority. It could be said of me that I take too much crap from players, but I agree with your premise that it's too prevalent these days.

If I'm not perfect in my iron will, and their nonstop B.S. comments begin to bug me, I'll stop the game and very obviously call forth at least one or perhaps both managers, and tell him/her/them that I've had enough public display about balls and strikes and that the unwarned ejections are about to start. The managers usually can read a 'stop' sign even if the players can't, and the smart@sses get disciplined toot sweet. (If the manager is part of the problem, that's a slightly more serious matter, but the principle is the same.) NSA has a nice rule that I have yet to enforce that if anyone but the batter, pitcher or catcher leaves their position to argue balls or strikes, they're immediately ejected. Hey, you've gotta play by the rules. Coach, I had no choice, it's in the book.

Always keep in your mind the unshakable self-image of yourself as the World's Greatest Umpire. Even if you kick a call (and you will, we all do), if you don't act like you screwed up a lot of people won't notice it, or will come to not believe what they once thought they saw differently. So just put doubts or errors behind you and concentrate on playing the next play and doing your best from this point forward.

When challenged, keep within reach the umpire's best attitudinal friend, an impassiveness which I call The Iron Mask of Indifference. If a player comes up to you raising hell and you don't get visibly angry back, and just stare through him as if you're at most faintly hearing a voice from the planet Lumpygravy, the player will be the one who comes off looking stupid, every time. This is incredibly hard to do but ALWAYS successful, even if the player is aggravated to the point of physical agitation (in which case the stakes are VERY high and you MUST calm him down, and this is the very best way).

This iron transcendence, backed by your perfect rock-solid self-image as W.G.U., is a mental state that has served me well and I bet will help you get over this heightened sensitivity.