[LIUmp]

Chap! The teams by me must have also caught the wackiness bug.

I'm at a local college field to do a night game between two varsity teams, one whose record is 3-11 and the other whose record is 0-14. I have plate. The home team is designated by the county association as the 0-14 team. We have no time limit, but we do have a run rule of 15 after 5 at bats by the losing team.

Top of the first, visitors score 16 runs. Pitcher looked like she had zero interest in being out there. Bottom of first, 3 outs on three pitches. Top of second, visitors score 7 runs. Bottom of second inning, home team gets a leadoff hit. The next batter is the home pitcher. She pops up in foul territory along the first base side, R1 is off first by 20 feet, catcher catches ball for the out and goes to throw to first for double play. Well, the batter is running full steam to first and puts her hand out to distract first baseman and/or hit the thrown ball. The ball hits her PITCHING hand and deflects away. We call the interference, and the runner on first out as well.

Top of third, pitcher doesn't come out of dugout. Coach tried to talk her into playing, but girl says, "I don't want to. My hand hurts." She finally comes out to throw one warm up pitch which goes over catcher's head and about 15 feet up on screen behind home plate. She sits on ground and says, "I want to go home." On deck batter turns to catcher and says, "you have anyone else who can throw the ball over the plate?" She says "no - except me, but I'm not good. But if I pitch, she (the hurt pitcher) is our only catcher." I think "oh great."

The pitcher leaves, the catcher becomes the new pitcher, and some kid off the bench becomes the new catcher. The equipment she is wearing is 5 sizes too big on her, she's using the glove as if it's on the wrong hand, and she can't throw the ball back to the pitcher, so she has to walk it out to her every time she gets it.

After the score reaches 43-3, we're in the top of the 5th inning with bases loaded and two out. The new pitcher is now starting to get "fair" at pitching and at least able to throw it NEAR enough to the plate to make the other team want to swing. The visiting coach calls time, and says to me, "I am just making position changes." I say "okay." She then tells her first baseman to pitch and her pitcher to go to first. I think "you've got to be kidding me."

This girl grabs the ball and stands about three feet behind the pitcher's plate. The girl who WAS pitching says to the new pitcher, "You have to put both feet on that white thing." So the girl says, "oh, okay." She then goes to take her first warm up pitch by winding up like the kid from that movie where he breaks his arm and can now throw 100 MPH and she stops right before she is ready to fire it in OVERHAND and says, "wait, how do I do this again?" The coach tells her to throw underhand. She does, but never took a step, leaving both feet planted on the pitcher's plate. Needless to say, the ball ended up in the home dugout. She then is told, "take a step forward", and she does, but this time she steps with her pivot foot. After her disaster warm up pitches, and a correction so that at least she's throwing somewhat like what the rule requires (think more like slowpitch), she proceeds to give up an additional 6 runs before we mercifully come to the end the top of the fifth.

The game took 3 hours to play 5 innings. I must have seen over 400 pitches, and probably 370 of them were balls.

I know I have a tight zone, but I've set a new low here! And, no --- the visiting coach didn't tell his girls to "leave" early, nor did my partner find anyone leaving early. And not one girl tried to swing at anything or bunt to help the cause of getting out of there. They played as if it were a championship game.

My partner and I were in softball hell.