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I agree that you handled it poorly. Never allow F2 to turn around to talk to you when he is in his crouch. This leads people to think that he is questioning your call. Instruct him to face forward when he speaks ot you in the crouch.
Secondly, nip this wanna-be umpire in the bud early. Explain to him that his job is to call the game, catch the pitch and lead the team. You will handle the umpiring. Do not give ultimatums and do not allow him to violate this pact a 2nd time.
19 years old? This sounds like a middle school F2!
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When in doubt, bang 'em out!
Ozzy
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