TwoBits reminds me of a local (to Anchorage) umpire that got fed up with heckles from the stands on balls and strikes. Ump calls time, goes out to the stands and sits down next to the heckler. Calls "Play".
Of course everybody's a bit confused. Heckler says something along the lines of, "what the hell you doing out here? you can't call the game from here"...
Umpire responds, "why not? With what I've heard from you I figured you had the better view!"
Not sure what happened--whether there was actually a pitch or not--but time was called again and the ump got back behind the plate and finished the game in a much quieter atmosphere.
BTW, this story, although credited to a "local ump", may be simply an urban umpire legend...
