I haven't been doing this for too long (second year HS) but I think good control early on prevents a lot of garbage plays later. If you can make it through your game with out the coaches being disgusted and the crowd not booing the entire time, you are probably doing a decent job. If you don't have to dish out a lot of technical fouls AND aren't putting up with a bunch of garbage from the players and coaches, this seems like pretty good balance.
I have only had to call a couple of intentional fouls and one girl for swearing. She was from an inner city school which has some of the rougher crowd. The coach came up to us before the start of the game and said, "Don't hesitate to give my players a T for swearing or anything else."
Made me kinda chuckle. It didn't get out of control though.