Had to watch the video again... You ARE correct, steal happens before the punch and whistle. I had just became new lead. Fair enough.
In this game it was almost as if my partner was the ONLY person to have actually seen it. I like to think this is not something I could ever miss, PCA or not, but it was so quick neither coach saw it either.
Green #34's coach was still in shock and trying to understand what had happened that by the time he was eyeing my partner's response I had managed to get partner focused on something else (FTs).
Coach and I had a quick talk about how that is NOT what he teaches his players yadayada, and I could also tell he was sincere when he apologized to the other bench for what had happened. Quick speech from both coaches to their players RE: NO retaliation etc... and game went into 4 OTs with out a hitch.
In a separate incident with different partner, HS Boys back to back Ts on 1 player for running mouth and foul language at my partner. That game ended in an ejection (2 Ts) in which the player returned moments later and we stopped/canceled rest of game.
Coach allowed parents to take control of player in hallway and player decided to return anyway.
1 bad apple spoiled it for the rest.