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I agree, this is HTBT. The way I picture the OP, I see a frustrated, inexperienced coach trying to demonstrate to the official the contact she believes just occurred. Is this inappropriate contact? Absolutely.
But I'd prefer a more "measured" response. A very direct, "Coach, you do realize that intentionally contacting an official is pretty much an automatic T and probably an ejection too, right?" I expect her hand to come off me like I was a hot stove and her next words to be an apology. If that happens, we move on. If not, I whack her and we move on.
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"It is not enough to do your best; you must know what to do, and then do your best." - W. Edwards Deming
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