This is something that should be addressed in a pre-game. I always ask a "foreign" partner how much contact they let go - especially hand checking and post play.
In situations where your partner is calling the game extremely differently to you, the ideal is to compromise and meet in the middle. Use a time out or between quarters to discuss it with your partner.
If your partner doesn't meet you in the middle, then in fairness to the players, the only option is to meet their standard of refereeing. However, this can be a real problem if your partner is letting way to much contact go, someone could gt hurt.
After thinking about, I guess there is just no easy answer
