When it comes to "player management" you have to consider time and place as well as your audience. I've had two really painful lessons in that in the past few months. In a "real" game setting (regular season HS, etc.) a good team with a good coach is usually fairly easy to manage. If you're having trouble with a player, the coach usually sees it and pulls the player.
But in wreck leagues and summer ball, all bets are off. The mouthy punk kid is just as likely as not to have a mouthy punk coach who doesn't understand the first thing about disciplining his little superstars. Trying to manage punks by getting in their grill doesn't shut them down, it leads to escalated punky behavior. They don't understand they're getting a break; they think they're right (as always) and you're just attacking them. You can't fix stupid!
You can only demonstrate to the punk that his behavior consistently leads to an undesirable outcome. Eventually the punk learns that no matter how "unfair" it is, when he pops off he gets whacked. Eventually he'll stop doing it. Or else he proves himself to be such a stupid punk over time that no good coach will pick him up for any level of ball that you and I want to be working. Either way, we don't have to deal with his punky behavior any longer.
Bottom line: whack the little **** when he deserves it. And if the coaches won't take care of business, and the TD and assignor won't back you, then screw 'em. You don't want to be working in that situation then anyway.
Just my bitter $0.02
