Hmmm. I don't have my rule books here, but doesn't the definition of a flagrant technical include a comment about "extreme conduct"? I would certainly classify what this coach said as extreme and have no real issue with the partner tossing him...I would also have been fine with the partner just whacking him and telling him it better not happen again...
Mark, where was this team from? I ask because my oldest brother is coaching his daughter's 8th grade team (they live in Amity) and - unfortunately - this really sounds exactly like something he would tell my niece.