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Andy,
If the NFL owners had any courage (wouldn't want any of them in a foxhole with me), they would tell the officials to step aside and eject participants.
However, since they don't, nothing will ever happen and the official will more often than not, be the one taking it on the chin.
BTW, I don't care where or how he grabbed him. I have been a bouncer in a bar and when you are involved in any type of "action", you grab anything you can to accomplish your task.
If his job is to break it up, you do what you can in a situation like that. If they (owners) are concerned about injury to the players, they should adopt the policy noted above.
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