You wouldn't know a rook from a pawn if bit you on the arse! Why don't you take up a real sport- like checkers! You can't move that piece there- what are you, NUTS??!!
And don't even get me started on the 1973 Fischer-Bruznekoff debacle! It was a TRAVESTY- a freakin' #@*%! TRAVESTY, I'm telling you!
