I too have a partner and we have a third for our 3 person games as well. We contact AD's ourselves to contract for games JV and below. Varsity contests are scheduled by conference commissioners who I assume are the same as your assigners.
If a commissioner contacts the head of our association to get officials for varsity contests - a 3 man committee of experienced officials in the association assign them to the people who have enough officiating experience - that they feel would do a good job, and usually to partners if possible. There have been times when partners have been split because one was not yet ready for that level of play. Other times - partners may split for an evening if one or the other has some type of conflict with a particular team. example - I was once assigned to do a varsity game for the school I work for. I called the commisioner and explained I had a conflict. He called the association president and he and I did one game, my partner and his partner did the other at my school. It all works pretty well.
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