Each official must determine what is and what is not flagrant. I believe in this situation (throwing the ball a the players back) that I too would call a flagrant foul.
In most cases where the players are looking at each other it warrants an immediate 'T'.
Also, we do have big egos as officials and like to think that we are the best. When you stop doing so, then maybe it is time to take up another profession.
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