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I think the first one was earned, it is not like you didn't warn him enough.
And for the second, nothing grates me more than when a coach is showing you up, but trys to hide it by saying he was talking to his kids (I know you didn't say that happended, but this sounds like one of those times). I say he deserved the second one too. If he is dumb enough to keep it up after you make eye contact to let him know you hear him, then he deserves what he gets.
As for the wife, who cares. He could have thrown a chair across the lane during those T shots and she would have said you were too thin skinned for running him.
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