[greymule]

I admit that I often overlook the jewelry rule in ASA slow pitch (never in Fed or fast-pitch). I was once sent 20 miles into the backwoods to do some league's "championship game," only to find a field with (a) four-foot-high solid wood foul poles firmly in the ground about 180 feet down each line (the outfielders played FAR behind the poles), (b) piles of scrap wood in left field (deep but reachable), (c) a large swing set in left-center field (d) a huge tree easily within reach in right center, (e) in right, about 250 feet out, a steep hill that sloped down to a thicket, (f) on the first-base side, a permanent, unmovable players' bench at a 45 degree angle to the line and within 8 feet of it, (f) movable bases with no two at all alike. (The ground rules took awhile.) The opponents were the "Junk Yard Dogs" and the "Bad Boys," each team identified by black homemade T-shirts with silver lettering. Earrings, nose rings, tongue rings, tattoos, bandannas, and studded paraphernalia abounded. For safety reasons, the Harleys were parked behind the backstop.

"Sorry guys, you have to take off all that jewelry. In addition, I find the field to be unsafe, so I cannot let this contest begin. Good-bye, everyone!"

Good-bye indeed!