There is a big difference between doing your job professionally and the philosophy being proposed by Old School and apparently your assignor...and for what it's worth, my HS partner comes from Ohio so I know first hand of the unique and sometimes completely against the manual, like no team control signal, way they do things.
As I stated earlier: In the NFHS the coach loses the box, so at that point I believe a non-calling official should go over to inform the coach, but it's not to allow the coach to voice their concerns, it's to remove some of the emotion and hopefully diffuse the situation.
If I'm going over to notify the coach I'm not talking to the coach, I'm observing the players. If the coach wants to use that first FT to talk to my backside...CALMLY...so be it, but after that second FT goes up, they get told to sit and I'm going about getting the ball back into play.
By doing it that way, I'm doing what I'm supposed to do following a T...notifying the coach and observing the players...I'm being professional and calm, but I'm not interacting with that coach. The smart coach realizes that they have an opportunity to vent a little, based on my location, but again they will be doing so to my backside and in a equally calm and professional manner.
The distinction may seem subtle, but by not saying anything but coach you have lost your box, this does usually work very well at calming the situation...key word being
situation, not coach...by giving a location that provides the coach may be heard, but in a way that nobody gets the idea that you are working a good cop, bad cop deal and selling your partner down the river by comforting the coach.