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To answer your questions:
1) if you are 40 yards away and the HL and BJ are close, it's probably not your flag.
2) I wouldn't recommend throwing your flag after conferencing with the other officials, although I'd be interested in what the others have to say.
3) A late flag after conferencing is probably not a good idea, a late flag several seconds after the foul as you are getting closer to the play may not be so bad. had to be there for that.
4) I have no problem with BJ calling taunting. And USCs are always succeeding spot enforcement whether it is live ball or not. As R, I'd take the penalty of the guy who threw the flag.
I'm more concerned about your mechanics on the TD. You don't need to be at the team box on a TD to control the sideline. I've never heard of such a mechanic. What would you have done if the receiver cut all the way across the field and got tackled at the pylon? Yes, you should be trailing the play in this situation and cleaning up behind it, but R and U are also doing that. You still have a potential goal line / sideline coverage. If you are at the 10-15 yard line when the player scores, you'll be around the 5-10 when the takedown happens and you don't have a problem throwing your flag for the DB PF. If you throw the flag there, you don't have any other problems.
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