Here's my take on talking to a Coach.
Rainmaker, do you think you can get away with everything Mark Padgett says to Coach? I don't think so...it's not in your personality. Some of these one liners can be used in a game situation, but make sure they fit your personality. You might have to come up with a similar comment in a different situation and just not have it in ya.
BE YOURSELF.
Jay Leno is a pretty funny guy, right? (or put someone else that you think is funny in the blank)
I could have Jay's, or any of a number of comedians, exact dialog for a certain act. But even if I blurted out the words verbatum...I would come off looking something less than funny. Maybe it's not in my personality to be funny or quick witted such as Mr. Padgett is. Therefore, I better stick with what works....
A competent, good looking, strong, young official who someday will know the rules as well as BktBallRef.