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Coaches are frequently wrong when they say somethng is "the rule". This situation could have been easily handled just by telling him the ball was being changed at the crew's discretion and not due to the nonexistent rule.
As for someone else on the crew doing something contrary to what you wanted...that happens from time to time with us deep officials when we throw a flag and someone else comes in and says it was uncatchable. You can have a confrontation or you can accept it and move on. It is not that big a deal. Maybe you don't want to work with that particular official again but that is no reason not to work with other officials.
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