I have remained mum on this issue because I believe that words can't hurt. As umpires, we need to master communication skills and learn the art of deflection. We will be the target of taunts - some deserved while others illogical at best.
Now...the only thing I can say is what my Mother taught me too long ago; you shouldn't apologize and use the words 'but', 'however' or 'if they had acted otherwise'. In other words, don't qualify your accountability.
I can't recall apologizing for anything that I have written on these forums. Maybe my words sting or prevent legitimate discussion from transpiring sometimes, but 0s and 1s don't mean much in the grand scheme of things. (Computerese for those who don't get it.) I have been involved in heated debates with many on this forum, yet I don't consider them enemies. A difference of opinion is the spice of life. (Besides, I know that I'm right and they are always wrong!
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So...what to do? It appears that our antagonists will keep pushing each other's hot buttons. Either learn to ignore it or do it in a way that wins the battle and gets the thread locked. Getting the last word in but looking like a chump is never becoming for an umpire - reference: Tim Timmons.
Life is short.