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I'm not sure what the other official's conduct was. I don't think you told us.
I agree though. USC requires ejection after two. However, you may eject on the first one if it is bad enough. Whether there are certain words are bad enough to eject for is not the debate here I don't think. Your first scenario I believe has a player yelling at his own team while the second one has a player yelling at an opponent. The second scenario is a worse situation in my book though.
As for commenting on plays you don't see I believe that your approach is the proper one to take. Many times people asking about certain plays seem to like to leave out little bits of information which we know are important but they see as immaterial.
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