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One of my umpiring colleagues was telling me about a "problem player" he has in an otherwise pleasant men's slow pitch league. This guy's apparently been ejected several times this season for abusive behavior towards umpires, but the league president doesn't have the courage to hand out a meaningful suspension. My colleague's solution? If he is assigned a game where this guy's team is playing, he will suddenly be afflicted with an illness just before game time and won't be able to umpire the game.
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