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6. On a called ball, make sure you add some words to decribe where the pitch was. Or say nothing. This especially helps when Pago Pago is playing Mitsubishistan.
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This one drives me nuts, both as a coach and an ump. I've worked games where the PU describes every freaking ball.
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8. If you are a base or outfield umpire and a ball is hit foul into the 17th row of the stands, wave both arms frantically and scream: "That is a foul ball," AND THEN POINT FRANTICALLY in the some direction. Addendum: If you are an outfield umpire and your partner at the base makes such a call, be sure to echo him/her, only use a louder voice and gesticulate more drastically.
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I'm not going to completely defend the umps here but I'll tell you from coaching LL and umpiring LL, the players are taught to run out every foul ball until they hear the ump yell "foul". Some kids are smart enough to realize that the ball just dented someone's car but others will just keep on running until you do yell "foul".
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16. Never, give the count as "Two Balls, One Strike." Always yell, "Twenty-One!!"
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Argh! I can't stand that!!!!!
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17. ALWAYS give the count, not just on odd-numbers or at someone's request ... and show it from the 3B bench allllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the way around to the 1B bench before you bring your fingers down.
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I worked a district game with this clown who insisted that he was the PU (words to the effect of "I only do the plate"). Well, the assignor was desperate and agreed to let him do the plate. The assignor and I were the base umps. I'm beginning to think Ace called this clown to put together his list as it describes this dude perfectly except for some missing items:
-- At the beginning of each half inning he would point at the pitcher and yell extremely loudly "IT'S YOUR FIELD, PLAY BALL!"
-- At the coaches' get together before the game, he began explaining to me and the assignor, in front of the coaches, our duties as base umpires
-- He informed the coaches that at the beginning of the third inning, he would make sure every player had their MPRs. Coaches asked him "so, you going to make our substitutes too?". He didn't catch that little dig.
-- After a two and half hour rain delay, he informed the coaches he didn't care what time it was, by his watch the time was 7pm (it was 9:45pm). LL rules state no inning can start after 11pm. He was overruling LL rules.
-- He did #17 before EVERY pitch and would sit there and stare at us until we acknowledge his count.
-- I expect him to be at LLWS next year
