ToGreySt,
Sometimes when the catcher gets "railroaded" in this situation, it's just a "train wreck"; sometimes it's malicious contact. This is solely a matter of umpire judgement.
I'm not especially impressed with your trainers based on your description of how they suggested you apply your judgement in these situations.
In professional baseball (MLB/MiLB) this is an accepted part of the game. (If you don't believe me, ask Johnny Estrada, Michael Barrett, etc.)
At all levels below professional baseball, there are rules intended to prevent a runner from "bulldozing" the catcher.
JM
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