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My experience has been that a quick glance will usually confirm the TO. However, there have been games I have been involved in, where a coach makes their request for a TO prior to the make of the FT, then turns and begins some prep work (erasing the markerboard, looking for a marker, calling for subs) for the TO. I acknowledged the coach's request and granted the TO per the request. To some degree it is a professional courtesy. I can only imagine how the rest of the game would go with this coach if I went letter of the law in this TO situation.
If for some reason the coach changes their mind, then just put the ball in play with the required provisions after a made FT, no big deal as the situation doesn't change, it is still a made FT. In future dealings with that coach, I would have the coach request it visually/orally.
If something other than a made FT happens, I just ask the coach if they still want the TO if they have possession of the ball. Never had a problem handling things this way.
In the end do what feels most comfortable and what works for you.
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