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I don't do a lot of rec leagues/kids games anymore and one of the primary reasons is just having to deal with the ignorant crap that comes with some of these games. The games that I do work are in quality leagues where I know those who run the league put the kids first, and in well organized adult leagues that hold the participants to a code of conduct.
The problem with games at the elementary/middle school level is that by and large the coaches are some parent who has little to no clue. In bad cases, the coach attaches his ego to the game and/or starts duplicating what he thinks he sees on TV. Also, most officials at that level don't have the experience to properly deal with coaches, so by and large, the domineering coach overwhelms the officials and thinks it's his right to have free reign. At the higher levels of the game, the coach's livelihood is often invested in the outcome of games, so I personally take that into consideration when dealing with coaches, but at this level, the tolerance for any sort of garbage should be at zero, and whenever I do any of these games, that's where my tolerance level is at. A simple sarcastic comment or a disrespectful snicker or jesture is enough to warrant a T from me in a kids game, whereas the same behavior likely wouldn't even draw my attention in a higher level game.
In regards to your sitch PAT, in the 1st quarter, the constant chatter may have drawn a "not on every play coach," then an ABS technical. A1's first comment was a borderline flagrant T, and his second one clearly was. Coach's grandstanding to A1 also should've been a T and the 2nd comment at this level a flagrant T. That you let A1 continue playing and didn't T the coach is unbelievable. You completely lost control of the game early and the game just went further and further down the toilet. I know your heart is in the right place Pat in that you don't want to hurt the kids or decide the game with a technical, but in order to manage the game you have to demonstrate control, and sometimes the only way to do that is to call technicals before the game goes in the toilet because once it does it ain't coming back.
In regards to fonzzy's sitch, I think the whole practice of signing a scoresheet to end a game is absurd and I would refuse to do it. I have no problem signing the book, but to expect me to go to the scorers table immediately after the game is expecting too much. Too many things can happen to officials and we can be put into unnecessarily awkward situations by being at the table at the end of the game, right where the losing team is just aching to make a comment. I'm not afraid of anyone or anything, but there's no need to invite a potential conflict, or to invite unpleasant comments for nothing. Stay away from the teams after the game and you can avoid countless problems.
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