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My 2 cents.
On the ball being thrown at the players face. (my own personal feelings) If he threw it at the players noggin - flagrant. You got lucky that the kid managed to get his hands up in the way, but he threw the ball at the kids head plain and simple. There is no reason to do that - if you feel he actually intended to hit the kid with the ball I can't see how it isn't flagrant. If it earns the T, I would feel it should be flagrant.
But let me ask another question - knowing the intensity of the game, once you had the player control did you close down on the kids so that nothing extra ciricular would happen? When I have a high intensity game like that with a hard foul, the first thing I do is close and make sure that I am extremely visible (if not in between them helping all parties get up) along with being very vocal 'good hustle everyone' 'lets get up clean' - just something to remind the players to keep their cool so that something stupid doesn't happen.
It sucks that it is the 'norm' for you to go to the bench after a game, even when it is calm wonderful game. I try to make sure that the scorekeeper knows that if there is something wrong with the book they need to let me know before the final buzzer to get it fixed, if possible. Once that final horn goes off all I do is make eye contact with them, a simple nod, and we are gone. It could be the cultural differences between the US and Canada or regional, but after a game the last thing I want to have happen is for a dialog to occur between myself/the crew and either team while on the court. If we are walking to our cars and a coach wants to say - good game, that is fine - I just don't feel comfortable addressing players or coaches directly after a game while on the court. But then again I am so 'anal' that I don't like it when a player or coach says good luck before a game - simply because I would hope that coach doesn't think I need luck to do the game. I have even changed my pre-game conference to 'play well' instead of good luck - but that goes back to the previous comment of being a little 'anal'.
Like all advice or comments, take it for what it is worth. As long as you are reviewing the situation in an attempt to better yourself and your calling ability, that is what matters. Even if you don't change anything, the fact that you are open to other opinions and open to reviewing your performance in the game is a big compliment to yourself as an official.
dan
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