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I'm also realtively new, and trying to move up -- and I've got to move fast since I'm 45 years old now!! What I have done that has helped is to watch enough games in your area that you can see who the best refs are. Attend the varsity games that will match up the top two teams in your district. If you can find out ahead of time who the refs will be, ask them if you could talk to them after the game about things you observe. Then two or three weeks later, approach them at an association meeting, or clinic and ask about a game situation you need advice on. Ask them at what level to be more relaxed about certain rules. For instance, my first JV game, there were a couple of uniform issues that were not strictly code. I had asked the teacher of our class about how to handle this, so I knew it was okay to say to the coach, "Okay, when these kids play varsity next year, their uniforms will have to be yadda yadda yadda, but today I'm not going to make a big deal about it, but I just want you to know." I was practicing being "detail-oriented" without being overly officious, and I learned that from watching others. If you talk to these better folks, you will also be extablishing a relationship, so that they will be watching you, too. When you work together, they can make suggestions, and they can tell your assignor, "Hey so and so is really learning fast" You don't have to be an apple-polisher, just listen and learn, and keep working on your game and do what it takes to improve and to get noticed.
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