"There was a "Discussion" at our meeting by those who said it was runners only advance if forced on lodged pitch because of batter becoming a runner on ball four or strike 3. They said then and only then would runners advance (if they were forced). Am I missing something here?"
You didn't miss anything, they did. The rule doesn't state that the runners advance only IF the runners were forced to advance. It's treated like a throw that goes into dead-ball territory. They might be mixing it up with awarding bases on an obstruction, ask them to provide you with the rule that supports their opinion.
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