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Rainmaker - Making sense is in the eye of the beholder. Usually Mrs. JCrow. I thought Golf made sense so I gave it a try.
One day, I found myself playing with John Daly, Jack Nicklaus, and Michele Wie. You know Jack's image as an avuncular good-will statesman for golf? All wrong. On the first Tee, Daly pulls me aside and says,
"Watch out for frigin' Nicklaus...he cheats. He'll do anything to win. The most dangerous Wood in his bag is his pencil!"
All thru the round Nicklaus would drive it into the woods. You'd hear...."whack...whack....whack....". Then he'd putt out and say,
"I got a Par."
On the Fifth Fairway, he deliberately ran his golf cart over Michele Wie's foot. The poor kid had to limp into the Clubhouse with her father swearing at Nicklaus in Korean.
I'm no match for Jack Nicklaus, even if he does have metal wood for a hip. I currently have a 43 handicap. But I had a Plan. I said,
"Look Jack. I say me and you go mano un mano. With one small stipulation....we can Trash-talk just like in basketball."
He says sure and hands Daly a thick roll of cash which I matched.
On the Sixth Tee as Nicklaus wound up his backswing, I blurt out,
"Hey, look! Arnold Plamer and Laura Davies are in the woods making whoopie!"
He shanked it onto the Interstate Highway.
I kept it up all round and beat him by an Old School NBA Score of 137-129.
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