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Speaking ASA...
POE 29D A pitcher fielding a ball in the circle is just another fielder and runners can leave their base. If they leave their base, the same rule applies while the pitcher holds the ball in the circle: once the runner stops, they must decide which way to continue or be called out.
If R3 had stayed put, once F1 catches the ball, she may then leave for home (as foolish as that would probably be).
Since in your scenario she needs to return to 3B to tag, her one allowed "stop" happened when she stopped & returned to 3B. Unless F1 is making some move indicating making a play, R3 must stay put once she returns to 3B.
The only way (IMO) R3 would be allowed to tag up and break for home is if the pitcher is still trying to control the catch during the tag-up, or if F1 makes a play on R3 or another runner.
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