I've coached a different sport than basketball and know full well the times I've *worked* an official when he made the correct call AGAINST my team. I've tossed out my fair share of "Good call! Good call!" when it was an obvious missed call which went my way too!
Running the sidelines reffing football and being bench side on the basketball court, I give quite a bit of leeway to the coaches as long as they are *working*. If they cross the line, which they rarely have done, I'll speak with them when I can.
As for players, I'll allow emotion to come into it as long as it's focused on the game itself. A quick warning to a player with a comment towards myself or my partner is headed off quickly.
Players are supposed to play, and coaches are entitled to *work* their craft. Just as I as an official am entitled to WHACK! when justified.
But I do know other officials which allow no leeway when it comes to working a game. To each their own?