Quote:
Originally posted by Oz Referee
When I started playing my coach (who was also my father) always told our team that:
1. The referees never make mistakes.
2. If the referee makes a mistake, see 1.
3. It is the coaches job, not the players, to question the referee, in a polite manner.
Also, he always pulled a player off the court if they acted up, regardless of the importance of that player. To me this is something that does not happen nearly enough in youth basketball. The coaches need to teach their players how to BEHAVE as well as PLAY.
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WOW!!! You were one very lucky guy, to have a dad like that!!
As for the remark about the female ref -- I do think I get more grief because of being female. I know that sounds like I have a chip on my shoulder, but I don't. I just can't help noticing that I get more chipping than the men. Especially in boys' ball. Girls coaches are usually glad to have a female ref, and they give me about the same grief as they give the male refs.
The remark described above would fall under flagrant in my book. If I heard it, he'd get the axe. If anyone questioned this action, I would have no trouble comparing it to a similar remark based on race or age. It is a belittling, dehumanizing attitude and does not belong in civilized society, anywhere. Period.
This very remark was made about me in one game at camp, about a year ago, but I didn't hear it. My evaluator was very harsh with me for not tossing the coach, but I couldn't since I didn't hear the remark. My evaluator said any remark of this nature should be grounds for tossing and that this kind of attitude was never to be tolerated in any way. He said that the women that succeed in men's bball, in the NBA and also at the HS level (we have a couple of women here who do some boys varsity) make it because they command respect by being always respectful to everyone around them, and also respectful to themselves.
He said he heard about a woman ref who tossed a coach for this kind of remark. She heard the comment, went over and said, "I'm sorry you feel that way. Since you can't respect me, you won't be wanting to finish this game, so I'm going to have your assistant take your place, and you can call my assignor tomorrow and let him know that I am now on your list" ( in our area, varsity coaches are allowed to list up to five refs they never want). Apparently, she said it very quietly, and with no sarcasm, or false sweetness, but just very matter of fact, like the best way to tell your teenager he is grounded for the next three weeks. The interesting thing is that the coach ended up getting her for TWO of his state tournament games!! And of course, she had not a peep out of him. At least, that's how the story goes.
[Edited by rainmaker on Jun 19th, 2001 at 01:42 AM]