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As a coach of 3-8th grade girls sometimes giving girls defensive instructions will have them back off defense completely and become timid. They'll be afraid to make mistakes because you might be "mad" at them. Girls also get sloppy when they get aggressive, forgetting everything they've been taught in the heat of the moment.
My 6th grade girls played in a tournament last weekend. The other team had 3 coaches and they yelled and screamed constantly. We won but his girls had 16 fouls in the first half to my team's 2. The coach screamed "call it both ways" so many times I thought I would scream. At the end we were up by 12 and I told the girls to run the clock and pass around. He screamed for them to foul my point. Foul they did, by knocking her to the ground.
It got uglier at the end with the coach screaming at the refs, me and facility management. Finally, one of the refs told him if he taught his girls to play the game then they might win. As might be imagined that didn't go over well. It almost caused a riot with the parents of his team wanting to fight. The other team's asst. coach told me that was the worst reffed game he'd ever had and asked why I wasn't more upset because he thought we were "cheated" out of calls too. I told him first it didn't seem to me to be unfairly reffed. I'd had these refs for several years and they've always called what mattered, not every bump, slap or little push. Second, no one will remember this game in a year, EXCEPT now the girls will forever remember that their coach wigged out over a game; and third my motto is that the refs ref, the coaches coach and that the parents of my team cheer. That's what we all sign as a code of conduct at the beginning of the season. Of course he disagreed because it was a "tournament" game.
We'll see what happens. I was supposed to feel guilty because I wasn't on board with the other coaches. I've learned a lot here, that's why I lurk.
Coach G.
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