Despite tomegun's metrics-based objections, I'd have to say that I'm having a pretty good year with coaches too. That's not something I measure in T's (I think I had two coach T's last year and probably have one this year). It's just something I have noticed. Last year I could expect to *have* to deal with a coach during most games. This year, very few coaches have gotten adversarial with me. To me, that's a good year.
Closely_guarded, I'll tell you two things I think have made the difference this year. One is a measure of self-confidence that I didn't have last year. Some of it is learning the speak the language. Some of it is time and experience. Some of it is feedback I've gotten in the off-season about my actual ability to officiate. Some of it is validation because I "moved up" this year.
Second, and probably more important, I realized that when a coach goes off it usually happens like an earthquake. A lot of pressure builds up, with no release, then it all goes at once. The longer the coach goes without relief, the bigger the release will be. So you want to communicate with coaches as often as they need it. Acknowledge that you hear them. Answer their legitimate questions. Let them vent a little. If you can have a bit of a laugh with them, do it. When it's appropriate, enlist them in settling down their players and getting the game under control. Don't let them abuse you, of course. As has been said, sometimes they're probing you to see where your line is: let them know. It's just business.
Be warned, sometimes it can all backfire. But I would rather learn a painful lesson from having tried and failed, than go year after year enduring the pains that come from not trying.
BTW, I would have T'd the coach for the name in the scorebook comment. It was a blatant attempt to threaten or intimidate you. Remember, your presence is required for the entire game. His is not.
