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Communicating with coaches is something that I'm working on to improve. I think the pregame meeting in many ways can set the tone, from my experience. I think officials who say too much in the captains or the coaches meeting get themselves into trouble. Some of the comments I've heard such as, "We'll work really hard for you tonight," invite uncomplementary comments later. Also, discussing how certain play situations will be handled also are too binding and often come back to bite, for instance, "We'll try to talk you out of fouls," "We're gonna focus on handchecking," and "Don't expect a whistle if you initiate contact on a shot," are really bad things that I've heard said in pregames and have been used by players and coaches to impact the integrity of the crew.
A good communicating tactic that worked for me last Friday in a BV game, working with another young official I learned here. When the coach A had "questions" about the way team B played defense the last time they played, I included coach B in the discussion. It got across to coach A that even though we were young officials that he would not be able to work us and to coach B likewise that we would communicate with both coaches and that trying to work us in that way could backfire. As a result, not a peep out of either coach for the entire game.
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