Quote:
Originally posted by RookieDude
Captains Meeting: (12 minutes)
"Ok guys get in close,(The band is loud), This is Mr. (name) and this is Mr.(name) and I am Mr. (name). We're going to show great sportsmanship tonight...not like all that crap you see in the NBA. If an opponent falls down...you can help him up...it's not against the rules.(smile)
(pointing at the stands) All these people paid good money tonight to see you guys play...not us officials having to get all funky. Understand? (Blank stares and some head nodding) Ok, (looking at partners) do you guys have anything to add? (Usually, "No" or "Just have fun")
"Alright, shake hands (players w/ players again) and have fun!"
Coaches Meeting: (2 minutes...Visiting Coach first)
"Hi Coach, (my name), and this is (U1's name) & (U2's name)
(sometimes I'll even shake the assistant coach's hand) 
...so coach, do you have any questions, comments, jokes?" (usually lightens the coach up...may have a variety of answers...such as "Not any I can tell here." etc. So far have not heard, "Yeah, 3 of um' are standing in front of me!"  )
Then I end the short conference with, "OK, if you see anything out there...don't be afraid to let us know."
(I love to see their face when I say this. You know, most coaches are going to "let you know" if they see "something" anyway...I just give them permission, and he that give-uth can take away-uth. 
Some of you may go absolutely nuts about this. Fine, don't use it...use what works for you and use what fits your own individual personality.
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I am extremely informal. I always introduce us to the kids by first name.
Hi, this is Bob. I'm Rich. Who's in charge tonight? OK, 22 red and 10 white. We're going to try to talk to you early on -- listen to us, we don't want any unnecessary fouls. Get loose balls to the nearest official - we're not chasing any basketballs. Any questions? Anything you want to add Bob? (Silence from Bob). Be good sports and have fun.
That's it. If it takes more than a minute I expect to be fined one post game beverage by my partner. Then the R goes to the table and the U1 (or U1/U2) goes back to opposite table.
In Wisconsin, we meet the coaches at 1:30. The R goes first and we go to the V bench first. We already know the coaches' names and we use them: Jim, nice to see you, I'm Rich. Hi, Jim great to see you, I'm Bill. R: Jim, are all your players legally and properly attired? Yes. Do you promise to exhibit and promote good sportsmanship? Yes. Good luck. Then we introduce ourselves to the assistant coaches and we move to the H bench where we do the same thing. By then, it's almost 0:00 on the clock. Anthem, introductions, off we go.
I'm sure there's variation among crews, but I give both teams the same amount of time and use the exact same words when possible.
--Rich