Sounds like a very difficult situation. It sounds like it deteriorated too quickly to do much of anything. You were put in a bad position with inexperienced official.
Did you have much of an opportunity did you get to talk to him before the game? Once things started going downhill it might have been wise to call an official timeout, if possible, and explain that 'no whistle' is better than an inadvertant one. I've seen Refs ask other officials to tuck their whistle inside their shirt when it became a problem.
But still, the coaches contributed to the problem. Like you said, they didn't give you a chance to rectify the situation.
I don't know what else you could have done. I'd be very hesitant to ask another official to leave the field. The way I see it, the officials are a team out there. If one goes, they all go.
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