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I'm a newbie as well--second year working tackle football.
In GA 5-man mechanics the wings (HL, LJ) and the BJ count the defense while the Umpire and White Hat count the offense. I believe this is what the NFHS Officials Manual says as well. In 6-man here the Umpire and Ref count offense, the BJ counts defense, and the wings count whichever team is on their side (LJ the home, HL the visitor).
One thing I think you might have left off is when the offensive team comes to the line, make sure to make a "mental note" of which receivers are eligible. A lot of times the umpire may be caught watching the left side of the line while the right side TE who's "covered up" goes downfield. I've been taught to keep an eye on this--but not too stern of an eye because it's of course the Umpire's main call.
Also, coming from a guy that works primarily HL, we appreciate it if the LJ is somebody who's not afraid to take charge and get spots, especially on first downs. If it's in the middle of the field, it really helps out if the LJ takes the spot so that the HL can work on setting the box or setting the chains if we have a first down.
But overall, if you picked all that up in one scrimmage--you're 2/3 of the way home. My first year I knew the mechanics, it was actually getting into a rhythm and doing everything I was supposed to do. Great job.
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