Quote:
Originally posted by TravelinMan
1. Appreciate what it means to know and administer all the rules ...
3...referees face the potential onslaught of harsh words and deeds during and after a contest every time out.
4. Teach your players that officials love the game, too
Many high school basketball officials were once great players.
|
Jack, you know from your extensive reading that "virtues" aren't an issue for many people anymore, if they ever really were. I'm especially thinking of "disinterestedness" as used in the 1800's. This didn't mean that one didn't care, only that one's whole being wasn't tied up in something, and that a neutral perspective was possible. That's what you're really advocating, and it is indeed a virtue, but not one most people would even acknowledge the existence of.
Most people are so wrapped up in their own little egos that "point of view" isn't something they can even comprehend as possible. It basically boils down to, "I'm always right." Usually, this is firmly believed either on the mistaken notion that self-love means never saying no to oneself or one's urges, or it comes from a sort of false affinity-group-idolatry -- my racial group is the best, my social group is the most, my university is the smartest, my religion is the most insightful, or whatever.
What parents especially don't seem to grasp is that it is impossible to give your child everything s/he wants, and even if you could, you shouldn't. Children need to learn boundaries and limits and how to deal with those. Parents should be pleased when refs check the kids' attitude. Parents should want their children to learn to respect people who get in the way of their little temper tantrums, and don't allow them to think of themselves as the center of the universe. Children who understand that they cannot control the tides, and that they won't always win, and that other people may see things differently grow up to be much happier. Unfortunately, parents don't always have that perspective, either.
All we can do is set an example, and spread the attitude. One of the problems I see in the refereeing world is refs who don't have a particularly disinterested perspective and either fly off the handle, or try to please everyone, or try to convince everyone, or have a pretty good attitude on the court, but a lousy attitude elsewhere. People like you and me, who really are more smart and mature than so many others
can only keep walking and talking the walk and talk and hope that others catch on.